This is why I love Armond White...

...because he writes reviews that begin with sentences like:

"Adam Sandler removes everything that made Robert Aldrich’s 1974 The Longest Yard funny and interesting."

Even when he is deliriously wrong, as he so often is*, he is a virtuosic, supernaturally gifted essayist, an urban journalistic superhero pummeling the enemies of Bad Cinema with an unrelenting assault of arch vitriol.

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*Although I suspect he is dead-on with TYL.